**This blog contains adult language and discussion of...ahem...adult activities.**
Warning: Spoilers Ahead!!! This is a recap blog which means I read the book and tell you everything that happens so you don't have to read it yourself. Do NOT continue to read unless you want to have the story completely and utterly spoiled.
Book Description: Drin is her tribe's chief huntress; she lives for the thrill of the hunt. Men and sex hold no allure for her, as Drin has never found a partner to satisfy her. When a T-Rex descends upon her village, destroying it, Drin demands that the tribes hunters go in search of the beast and slaughter it. Opting for safety instead of revenge, the tribe moves to a new location, hoping that the big beast won't follow them.
We begin with a group of hunters looking down over a devastated village. The homes are destroyed and the people lying dead all around. Most of them have been at least partially eaten. A young woman named Drin is among the hunters but the village is where her mother lived. She finds her mother among the dead and begins to cry. Another hunter named Grul is unable to find his wife.....well, he finds her foot but that's it.
This book was published in 2013 and this is my first time reading it.
(((Note from future me: I honestly thought this was a shifter book, y'all. I swear I did. I never would have picked it up if I knew what it really was. Oh, the horror. THE HORROR!!!)))
This book takes place back in an alternate reality where dinosaurs and primitive people roamed the earth simultaneously. They speak like stereotypical cavemen throughout the book but I refuse to type anything out that way. The people speak. The dinosaurs just grunt a lot.
We begin with a group of hunters looking down over a devastated village. The homes are destroyed and the people are lying dead all around. Most of them have been at least partially eaten. A young woman named Drin is among the hunters but the village is where her mother lived. She finds her mother among the dead and begins to cry. Another hunter named Grul is unable to find his wife.....well, he finds her foot but that's it.
Drin and Grul build a big fire for the night that the surviving villagers can gather around. They eat a metric fuck ton of a fruit called srad which seems to be their version of weed so they're numb and a bit high. Drin has a hallucination about the T-Rex chasing her but it's super boring and not worth recapping.
Morning comes and everyone wakes up. Drin tries to ask Grul what they should do but he's too busy staring at her boobs. I guess she wears a loincloth but no top. Drin is used to being stared at. She tells us that she tried sex once and thought it was “boring and painful” so she never bothered to do it again. She leaves Grul with drool hanging off his mouth and goes to ask some others what they should do. No one offers her any solutions. She tells them she wants to kill the T-Rex for revenge.
They decide to call a meeting. Grul and a woman named Srie are asked to lead since they're the oldest now. The actual village elders all got eaten in the attack. Drin repeats that they need to kill “the big lizard” because she knows it will be back. Srie thinks they should just leave and find a safe place to live. She doesn't think they could possibly kill something that big. Drin actually sees the truth in this and says that maybe they can at least wound it and discourage it from coming back. Grul sides with Srie, saying there's no way they can win against the T-Rex.
The remaining villagers vote to pack up and move somewhere else so Drin is forced to go with them. She thinks it's dumb because the T-Rex will eventually find them. Weeks pass and they make a new home somewhere else. New mates are chosen and impregnated so the population will rebuild and everyone eventually forgets there is any danger out there. Except for Drin. She keeps telling them it's only a matter of time but they laugh at her.
Two months later, the T-Rex returns. Drin sees him first and goes to warn the others. There's a fierce storm raging and it's dark so when the people run out of their huts, they can't see anything. Everyone gets super pissed at Drin thinking she's just crying wolf but then the T-Rex attacks. They can see it clearly now and Drin notices the feathers along his belly. This means it's not fully grown yet and it's trying to establish its territory.
The villagers scatter, trying to find some kind of shelter while Drin mounts her attack. The T-Rex manages to dodge all her attempts. She leads it away from the rest of the people and into the trees toward a space in the path where it squeezes between two big rocks. Over the last two months, she's set up several traps along the way in anticipation of this event. The first is like a trip wire that will fire a bunch of spears at the T-Rex. The spears hit him in the nose and piss him off but don't actually hurt him much. She makes sure the T-Rex sees her running toward the next trap. It's a big trench she'd dug and covered with leaves and branches to disguise it. It's not deep enough to trap him forever but she hopes falling in it will break a leg or something. It falls in and ends up breaking a toe but that's about it.
As Drin runs toward her next trap, she tells us she's “horny as hell” from the thrill of the hunt and wants to....ahem.....double click her mouse if you know what I mean. In her excitement, she gets lost and misses her last trap entirely. Realizing she's lizard food, she turns to watch the T-Rex approach. He seems wary of her now but that could just be her imagination. The T-Rex grabs her and holds her in the air. He sniffs her and then takes off her loincloth leaving her completely naked. She looks down and sees something that's 2 feet long and as wide as her arm. At first she can't figure out what it is but then she realizes it's his.....ahem.....little lizard if you know what I mean. She panics because there's no way that thing is going to fit inside her.
The T-Rex tries and fails to.....well, you know what I mean. She wraps her entire body around his little lizard and acts as some kind of human fleshlight as he thrusts himself through her arms and legs and boobs repeatedly. (Don't ask me how he gets the leverage to do this without just knocking her off. We're not told and I'm trying very hard not to think about it much.) He likes it because it's essentially a hand job. She likes it because it's rubbing against her. In fact, she REALLY likes it. Twice. After he finishes, the T-Rex simply puts her down and starts to leave. Grul picks this moment to run up and quickly becomes a post-sex snack for the T-Rex.
The book ends with Drin going back to the village. She tells them that Grul died heroically while trying to save her and that the T-Rex lost interest in her after he'd eaten Grul. She looks around the fire and tries to decide which of the young men there will be able to get her off as well as the giant lizard.
And that was the whole book, y'all. I thought it was a shifter book but no. It was.....well, beastiality really. I mean, she basically had sex with an animal. What has this blog come to?
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